Wer bin ich? Die eigene Existenz und das Lyrics-Puzzle...

[ein_bewerber]

Hallo miteinander,

ich lese in diesem Forum schon eine ganze Weile mit - es ist schön, dass hier so offen mit dem Thema Suizid umgegangen wird. Für mich ein Grundrecht jeder autonomen Existenz.
Seit längerem mache ich mir Gedanken, wie man sich als Mensch und das, was im tiefsten Inneren vor sich geht, am besten beschreiben kann. Unter anderem deshalb, weil dies vielleicht den Angehörigen nach dem finalen Schritt hilft, die innere Zerissenheit besser nachvollziehen zu können. Ein Abschiedsbrief allein - und sei er noch so ausführlich - reicht dazu meiner Auffassung nach nicht aus.

So bin ich auf die Idee gekommen, meine - zugegebenermaßen brachiale - Musik als "expressionistisches" Vehikel für meine Gedanken zu benutzen. Motto: Warum das Rad neu erfinden? Dazu habe ich diverse Schnippsel aus den Texten meiner bevorzugten Künstler extrahiert, die zusammengenommen ein ziemlich genaues Bild meines inneren Ichs ergeben. Zumindest für diejenigen, die sich am Ende die Mühe machen, das Puzzle zusammenzusetzen. Es handelt sich fast ausnahmslos um Jazz-Metal- oder Progressive-Metal-Bands mit sehr komplexen Liedern, die sich offenbar über das Leben und den Tod ähnlich viele Gedanken machen wie ich auch.

Erschreckt nicht über die Länge des Postings, ich habe hier mal alles reingepackt - das wollte ich schon vor einer Weile mal gemacht haben.

Bis die Tage!


--- Nevermore - No More Will ---
No more will to live, I see the world fade
No more hope inside, my life means nothing anyway
Just shades of gray, I slip away again
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Thought Industry - Blistered Text And Bleeding Pens ---
In life I'm skin stretched to form my body. With life
We can hope to grow old alone. In life all is well.
Strapped empty to a placid dream. In the fields is where
I belong. Blistered text and bleeding pens.

In life we are one. Extensions of each other. With life
We can find that death is on the outside, in life all is
Well, left dancing a laughing tree. In the hills is where I
Belong. Blistered text and bleeding pens.

Venice please will you hide my face and change my
Eyes. Friends aren't friends. They look to themselves.
Their advice is wrong. Selfish. Blatant. On the Bridge of
Sighs a piece of bleeding art. Mold me still with plaster
Joints and a pompous grin. I shall die within my song.
---------------------------------------------------------

--- Thought Industry - The Flesh is weak ---
On a frozen meadow lake, a breath's exhaled. A
Dove. It's head within it's wing. A runny-nosed child
Laughs without worry. Post office critics spread gossips
Creed. Grandma still wishes she could run. Newspaper
Topics "Fear Far Away". Grandma talks so young, when
Life was grand. I will stand on the window ledge. Dandelions in my
Hair. Hands raised towards the sky. Dying after all, was a
Parents lie.

They feed us war, they feed us poverty. Melt to dust
My plastic leaders. Politicians, spinning life's roulette
Wheel. Making money worth more than life. Macho-
Hero, you better back away. No emotion, yet dreaming
Love. Maybe I just hate people as a whole. Once again
The God of Life.

A cloud covers my face. I'll take the time to think.
The flesh is weak. My hands are clenched until my nails
Draw the blood of thought. The flesh is weak.

Rise for work. Day of responsibility. Rise for dollars
To buy peace.

Lost again I am upon my window ledge.
My dandelions have turned to a halo of thorns. Now I
Comprehend why Jesus wept. The human race has been
Diseased with indifference. Pain twists upon my face. I'll take the time to think.
The flesh is weak. My face shuts till my eyes pour the
Blood of thought.

Filled with despair. On the eleventh floor. With a
Gentle touch, I'm thrown towards the ground. Life's
Glorious end.
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - Forever ---
In this neon black gloom I still see her face
She comes to me bringing darkest hour, I am forlorn
The pain is reborn
You are forever I still wonder where you are
I know you're dreaming neon black
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Rage - Certain Days ---
When I remember what happened that lead me right here
what made me lonely and forced me to disappear.
There were periods in my life that came from my darkest depths, beyond the edge
like a delirium I couldn't help, I drifted aside, it wasn't right
----------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - Forever ---
Religion changed the face of man, thou shalt not kill, we all are gone
The seed of ignorance is born, thou shalt not think, thou shalt conform

Cling to wasted beliefs and visions and bathe in apathy again
No solution, the retribution of spiritual sickness begins

The legacy of suffering is through, the guilt we bear shall not tear us in two

Born we are the same, within the silence, indifference be thy name
Torn we walk alone, we sleep in silent shades
The grandeur fades, the meaning never known
---------------------------------------------------------


---- Kansas - Dust in the Wind ----
I closed my eyes,
Only for a moment and the moment's gone
All my dreams Pass before my eyes a curiosity
Dust in the wind
All we are is dust in the wind

Same old song
Just a drop of water In the endless sea
All we do
Crumbles to the ground Though we refuse to see

Now, don't hang on
Nothing lasts forever but the earth and sky
It slips away
And all your money Won't another minute buy
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Queensrÿche - I Don't believe in Love ---
...
She made a difference
I guess she had a way
Of making every night seem bright as day
Now I walk in shadows, never see the light
She must have lied 'cause she never said goodbye

No chance for contact
There's no raison d'etre
My only hope is one day I'll forget
The pain of knowing what can never be
With or without love it's all the same to me

I don't believe in love
I never have, I never will
I'll just pretend she never was real
I don't believe in love
I need to forget her face, I see it still
....
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - This Godless Endeavour ---
And on the open road we came to a sign
For it was foretold that the weak would inherit
And nothing would change
Here we are at the crossroads, standing face to back
Still afraid to see our eyes
I feel helpless and alone, trapped on the third stone

Godless are we, godless are we

Sitting here sideways on a cold stone floor
My guitar gently bleeding and wanting more
When I heard a sound come rapping, tapping on my door

Hello, I'm happy to meet you
In your confidence is it safe?
Sit down I'm happy to greet you
To feed your greedy dog at the edge of the stage?
But before, before you slam the door
Tell me when, tell me why, tell me what this unzulässiges Wort life is for
We fly through this godless endeavor
We try to explain the black forever

I feel helpless and alone, trapped on the third stone

I feel permanently stoned, this godless endeavor the only cage I've known

Our organic equation has shown its flaw
Can we agree to disagree on the concept of god?
As I lifted up my brother he said to me
“Abandon naive realism, surrender thought in cold precision”

I feel empty and deranged, denied one last epiphany and ushered from the stage

Thou shalt not question, the role of science is not to eliminate god
As alternative gods multiply science stands accused of theocide

Consume
Conform
Consume
Conform

The children sitting in the trees, they turn to laugh at me
They tell me that I'm insane, and in my mind I know I'm to blame
Alone within my lunacy, dementia fills the void within me
No testament, prayer or diseased lament can heal my wounds
They are so discontent

All the faithful fall onto their knees
And praise the priests of industrial disease

We contemplate oblivion as we resonate our dissonance
In godless random interpretation
The universe still expands, mankind still can't understand
How to define you, so hide your face and watch us exterminate ourselves over you
Welcome to the end my friend, the sky has opened
---------------------------------------------------------

--- Psychotic Waltz - Nothing ---
not so long ago there was a time
the naive animal was a wiser thing
and these devils that we accept as reality
did not exist here before
nor do I think they were meant to be

they have enshrouded themselves
with the comforts of wealth
inside this temple of material things
which they cling to
all because the hand
was much easier to see than the spirit
and upon the educated discovery of this
they have made their decision
not only for themselves
but for everyone else as well

everything you've ever come to experience
to anyone else here has never been
and will never be

life does not exist
memory is nothing more than photographs
a looking glass to see just where you've been
not what you've been there for
realize your insignificance to the universe
and to infinity

you will have then cast away
the pride of all these things you held so dear
agony and pleasure are a suffering to one another here
the wisest is the fool who realizes he knows
nothing, nothing

turn your back on this misconception
that the body is the temple
it's just the tool of the soul
the brain is only the house of the mind
and soon you'll have to give back
everything you've borrowed for this lifetime
only then you'll find
you have spent all this time
struggling for the wrong things
and all of your works here have been nothing

everything is nothing
---------------------------------------------------------

--- Queensrÿche - Roads To Madness ---
Most of this is memory now
I've gone too far to turn back now
I'm not quite what I thought I was
But then again I'm maybe more
The blood-words promised, I've spoken
Releasing the names from the circle
Maybe I can leave here now and,
Oh transcend the boundaries

For now I'm standing here
I'm awaiting this grand transition
The future is but past forgotten
When you're on the road to madness

Times measure rusts as it crawls
I see its face in the looking glass - Stop
This screaming laughter hides
the pain of its reality
Black, the door was locked I opened
And now I've paid that price ten-fold over
Knowledge - was it worth such torment,
Oh to see the far side of shadow

And still I'm standing here
I'm awaiting this grand transition
I'm a fool in search of wisdom
And I'm on the road to madness
Yes, I'm on the road to madness

I'm awaiting endlessly
Pounding rhythms echo me
Won't you take me somewhere
far beyond the void

And still I'm standing here
I'm awaiting this grand transition
Maybe one day, oh I'll meet you,
and we'll walk the roads to madness
Yes, we're on the road to madness

Oh, I think they've come to take me
I hear the voice,
but there's no-one to see
I can't scream,
too late it's time

Stay on the course to pass
You'll never find the answer
To a place where darkened angels
Seemed lost and never found
Scream to see the light of
Forming figures fast behind you
Lay the past in the wind to spin
And your fate will sail
beyond the open plains
Sail with angels onward
Live or die for the chosen one said
Saber sights cast a spell behind you
And they lock in all around

Free the scene insider
Never looking back to find why
Ride a course till the end of time
And you'll stand atop the gate
Laying waste in a path recited
Fighting force won't avenge
the guided black wing
Oh, electric might poses fright inside me
Seeing light at the end of sight
reminds me
I've passed away
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - Dead Heart in A Dead World ---
To see the last survivor fall
To see their bastards sons against the wall
To see the emptiness as we decay
I see the world is dead, I am betrayed
Dead heart in a dead world
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - Heart Collector ---
Nevermore to feel the pain
The heart collector sang
And I won't be feeling hollow for so long
Nevermore to feel the pain
The words fall out like fire
I believe when you can't believe anymore
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - Emptiness Unobstructed ---
Within the cold absolute
The cold brutal truth
There is a pained angel
He will shelter you from harm
And sing to you throughout your darkest hours
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Nevermore - C.B.F. ---
Blank, their state of mind
The apathy they find leads them into nothing
Rotting away, another lost sight today
Swallowed into the nothing again

Killing yourself, killing your will to be
But you don't give a damn
Just numb the pain

The tightrope now is tread
Ambition lying dead, lost in the fire so numbing
Numbing decay sucks your will of life away
Lost in decay you number your days

Swallow the fire, breathe in the black
Just one more hit could kill
Fulfill the death wish in you
Swallow the fire, breathe in the black
Another life is wasted, another death is tasted

If all the words I've said
Could get inside your head
Numb to the world of daylight
Kill the decay, usher in the light of day
Free from the fire you're finding your way

And if you choose to live this way
I'll count the days 'til you're gone
And if you choose to live this way
I'll shed no tears when you're gone
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Warrel Dane - Equilibrium ---
I live in a sick world without balance or sense of reality
In a fractured moment we are torn into the fragments
Of a sick world without equilibrium
Slowly fading we lose control
Slowly decaying, losing all
---------------------------------------------------------

--- Metallica - No Leaf Clover ---
Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
Was just a freight train coming your way
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Fates Warning - No Exit ---
Under brooding skys and watchful eyes
On convulsive seas of false urgency
We walk empty corridors in vain
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Dream Theater - Only A Matter of Time ---
To the practical observer
It's just a matter of time
"You can deviate from the commonplace
only to fall back in line."
I understand mine's a risky plan
and your system can't miss
But is security after all a cause
or symptom of happiness?
---------------------------------------------------------

--- Trick of Light - Neuromancer ---
Win the price or loose an other
Darkness in his eyes
Another heroe with a broken heart
Another death to moarn
He lost his way and cursed the day that he was born
The borderline, a little time, then paradise in sight
A silent klick, a raging kick - you left the world behind
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Crimson Glory - Lost Reflection ---
Life in the attic
I like my rocking chair
Staring in shadows
Crouched in the corner
Waiting for something
Laughing at nothing
No one there
And on and on I wonder is there more
What is life beyond the attic door
The full moon in my eyes
Is all that's real
The mirror's lost reflection is in me
---------------------------------------------------------


--- Blind Guardian - Bright Eyes ---
Leave me alone, isolation bears hope
There's something else waiting, a promised destiny
Freezing me, I feel restless and low
These days full of sadness how joyfully changed into fear
My freakshow will start tonight
Don't miss the right time

Bright eyes
Blinded by fear of life

Everything is out of control
In my future plans
Noone's left to hurt
Sorrow's gone away

Broken memories, walking upstairs, step by step
I see the whole world burning

I feel alone
Who really cares?
Born into ashes to lose all the games with a smiling face

So I sit still in my room, today
Winter's here in summer season
Shall I say I was wrong
If I'm right ?
And farewell to my final hope
---------------------------------------------------------

[speedy1]

und jetzt bitte in deutsch

[ein_bewerber]

Hallo Speedy1,

ich glaube, bis ich das übersetzt habe, bin ich schon tot...

[ein_bewerber]

... und dabei ist es nur ein kleiner Schnippsel...